Cowboys and Aliens (Movie)

We all know that aliens will invade our earth in America part ignoring other region/country. Even in time when America is in "Wild West" era. You don't believe me? Check this movie: Cowboys and Aliens (2011)!

It all starts with this bloke wake up in dry plain with wound in his stomach, a picture of a woman, and that iron bracer. He tries to take it off by fiddling on it and even use rock to break it but it won't come off his arm. Maybe he needs crowbar.

 

Then three old men along with a dog approach this guy, asking direction. One of them notes that he's wounded and has iron bracelet and says he could be someone with bounty. When one of them about to secure him...

 

...he fight them all with what i can describe it as Cowboy's CQC. He stabs one of them with knife in thigh, grabs rifle, clobbers them with it and sometime fires it. It goes without saying he punches a lot. I reckon they deserve to get killed like this as they carry America-Indian's scalps. They're certainly not good guys.

 

After he looted from one of the dead for cloth like later Elder Scrolls, he took one of the horses and ride it. The dog voluntarily follows him. How nice.

 

He arrives at a town barge into a house but saying hello, first. Then he washes his wound and drinks alcohol to ease the pain.

 

But then someone points a gun on his back and leads him to this room. Turns out this building is a church.

But he tend his wound. He is most likely nice person.

 

The era doesn't called wild west if there's no troublemaker with gun around. Here's the example, his name is Percy. He shoots indiscriminately to any building including that church and this saloon. No one get shot but his act is certainly troubling other. That bartender named Doc (because he's also a doctor) complaints about Percy's act to shoot his saloon. Percy respond it with ask Doc to face him and later bullies him. His arrogant act is justified by his father who's big rancher that keep the town alive or such. That bloke is really schmuck.

 

The preacher told Percy to stop bullying Doc. Percy stops it but he has another idea to embarrasses Doc. He collect alms to other citizen for Doc while pointing his gun. When Percy turns to the protagonist, he kicks Percy's "nut" and he walks away. Percy threaten him with gun but he doesn't care.

 

Angry with John Doe's behavior, Percy shoots blindly and unintentionally shoots deputy's shoulder. Then sheriff arrives with his men and takes Percy into custody ignoring both his reasoning and his bodyguard's warning.

 

Meanwhile in a plain where livestock and the herder live peacefully. One of the herder is drunk and about to defecate in nearest river. But suddenly there's explosion and beam, the bloke safe inside the river. When he get up his co-worker and the livestock are gone and the plain become burned like this.  

 

Back to town, our hero visit the saloon and order a whiskey. Doc's wife said it's on the house for kicking Percy's "nut". Then this lady named Ella approaches him. She takes interest on that mysterious bracelet and later say "you don't remember anything, do you?". Oh! I forgot to tell you that the protagonist has amnesia.  

 

Turns out the protagonist is wanted man by the name of Jack Lonergan and he's classified as very dangerous bandit. Naturally, sheriff round up his men and attempt to subdue Jack. So it's another Cowboy's CQC action. Jack kicks guy's revolver, smash another with whiskey bottle, holds the another and presses hot barrel's gun on his cheek. It happen so great and such. Jack maybe triumph over sheriff and his man but later got clobbered with gun's handle by Ella and he faints. The sneaky lass.       

 

It goes without saying that Jack ends up in jail. Later he got woken up by Percy's repeated spitting. Then Jack bangs him against bars and become unconscious. The bastard needs harsh manner lesson.

 

Meanwhile at the meadow, the drunken sod is being punished by ripping him by using 2 horses and binding his arms and feet. It's quite well known torture method beside the one using torture rack. He got tortured because of drinking while working, also to squeeze fact about what happened to the cattle and his fellow. After the owner named Mr. Dollarhyde (that's the one beside the tortured ones) got informed that his son is being held by sheriff, he gather his men to go to town. Before he go, he cut the rope that bind poor guy's arm and slap horse on the opposite direction. Making the guy dragged for good. The poor sod.

 

When sheriff about to send Percy and Jack to federal court in Santa Fe. Mr. Dollarhyde and his men comes in to bargain with sheriff about Jack that has robbed his wagon. Percy keep begging to his father but Mr. Dollarhyde keep shut him up.

 

Before things getting more heated between the cowboys. UFOs come from the sky and blast the town along with everyone there. They also kidnap some of the denizen including: sheriff, Percy, and Doc's wife. No, they don't use tractor beam that we know from modern alien invasion. Instead they use flexible cables. Sounds very rough but they get the job done.

 

Suddenly, Jack's iron bracelet emits ray like that. Later he can shoots plasma from it to blast cell wagon so he's free.   

 

And he uses the bracelet to shoot down one of the UFO. The UFO isn't shaped like saucer or sort like that. It has side wings and aerodynamic front. Jack and Dollarhyde investigate it a bit. Suddenly there's scream from one of the house and revealed a bit the alien. It moves very fast and leave trail of blood. Dollarhyde decides to chase after it in the early morning. He told Jack to come along with him but he refuses.

 

Instead, he goes to this cabin where he has flashback of him and the woman in the picture who according to sheriff is a prostitute. No. There's no adult scene on the flashback. I promise. They seems settle down and such. Jack revealed lots of golden coin but the woman tell him to turn them back as it's blood money. Obviously Jack is upset to her.

 

Then the golds vaporize and the house is holed pretty bad. Then the woman got kidnapped by the alien. That's the end of the flashback for now.

 

After that, Jack join the rescue group which consist of Mr. Dollarhyde along with his men, Ella, Doc, Sheriff's son, and some of town citizens.

 

Then rain is coming. So they have to spend the night at that ruined misplaced steam boat. Whether this is caused by the aliens or not, the movie don't explain that at all. Maybe we can assume it's the alien's deed to spice things up.

 

By the way, Mr. Dollarhyde is Harrison Ford. So i call him Ford from know because his real name is much shorter/easier to write everyone knows him. He's soft to Sheriff's son that he gave him his knife. I thought he's such bastard but he's quite nice here.

 

While Jack is in shower (with rainfall leak from the premise), Ella approaches him for bit romantic scene. Suddenly his bracelet turns on and the dog barks, that means...

 

...the alien is within the premise. It had killed Ford's men but he approaches the sheriff's son quite cautiously. It opens its diaphragm to reveals its (other) hand that's fleshy and tender. Suddenly, the alien got shot on its back. The preacher saves the boy!

 

It goes without saying that the alien attack the preacher. It jumps on him and grabs his neck. Fortunately Jack arrives just in time he shoot his revolver and later use his bracelet. But it manage to escape the plasma blasts. At least, the preacher is saved. Right?

 

Engineer_no01.wav. I don't like that they only bury the preacher, ignoring Ford's men. I'm sure they're also died back there. Such cruel fate for supporting cast henchman of arrogant rich man.

 

Continuing the Alien's blood trail, the group encounter bandits in this valley. Is this the end of their journey?

 

Turns out the bandit are Jack's group (before amnesia that is). One of them is Jack's admirer named Hunt. Jack punches him to show some charisma. The bloke got his teeth broken. That looks nasty. Later the bandit lead the group to the rest of the bandit. Jack hopes to recruit the bandit to fight against the aliens.

 

It turns quite bad. The new bandit leader don't like Jack. It's revealed that Jack left the gang along with their last plunder to settle down with the prostitute. No wonder, all of the bandits no longer with Jack. The Jack is interrogated for the last loot. Unsatisfied with his answer, the new leader about to tell bandits to kill Ella (who's accused as the prostitute)...

 

...Jack shoots him with the plasma blaster. Jack told the bandits to put down their weapon so the group can escape.

 

A brief moment after the bandits chase the group, UFOs appear to blow everyone and also to kidnap everyone.

 

Ella is captured but Jack manages to jump into the UFO that catch her. Later he blast the UFO to set her free but also make them fall into a river along with the UFO.    

 

Briefly after Jack and Ella reach the riverside, an alien appears and gives Ella swift uppercut. Later, it got shot by Jack's blaster. Is she going to survive?

 

Not for long. Also the group got caught by the America Indians, from Apache tribe to be precise. Things get worse.

 

Ella don't get proper burial. Instead The Apache Indian throws her corpse into fire. Such rude cremation. But at least, the group don't have to pay the Apache Indian not even a coin. It's free!

 

Then all of sudden, the event becomes really ridiculous. The fire turns weird and Ella is back! Witnessing such miracle, The America Indian treat her kindly and become friendly. Turns out, Ella is (another) alien and she can speak Apache Indian language fluently. She's the survivor of the bad alien's attack from other planet. Later she explain that the bad alien come to this planet...for gold! I'll be honest. I'm cynically laughing a lot at this point.

 

The Apache commence a ritual that can bring back Jack's memory as he knew the location of Alien's base location. While he's sleep on Ella's lap, he has flashback when he and his fair lady are kidnapped. She got dissection without anesthetic! Then the Alien "Medic" put something cubical into her dissected part and she turn into dusts. You see that thing with red lit on the right? That's the plasma blaster. When the alien makes cut in his belly, Jack fight backs by grabbing the laser cutter and cut its face. Then he wears the bracelet and run away. Thus he remember where's the alien base.

 

On the next day, the group along with the Apache set out to attack the Alien base over there. There's bit dissonance within them. The Apache Chief want to position his warrior around the cliffside as they're mountain warrior. While Ford's plan is to flank the alien. He though that it's useless to fight from high place when the aliens have UFO. Later, Jack leaves the place...

 

...to recruit his former bandit gang. Jack confidently tells them that if the aliens are left alone they will exterminate all of the human. To further convince the bandits, he says that he will make them rich if they join his cause. He know that the Aliens has large gold stash in the base.

 

Thus Jack back with the bandits along with the dog. He's gone since that alien encounter in the ship but for some reason he stayed with the bandit. You're enigma, doggy.

 

Next day, they prepare for war. The bandits lead by Jack, sneak near the base and climb the structure.     

 

Then he throws bags of dynamite along with the lit ones into a large crevice. Then Jack's team climb down to safety and BOOOOM! Large explosion happens.

 

The explosion makes the aliens come out. Ford along with his men and the bandits ride confront the aliens directly on their horse. The battle is hardly on human side. It's sensible in that era for human to have handgun and rifle. But the alien's skin has great resistance against gunshots and arrows. Also you can see the alien have large plasma cannon there. I asked a relation on Discord about cavalry's warfare in Wild West era. Yes, it's more or less the same with this movie. But, you can't expect to win the battle against these alien by using the same warfare against America Indian. This is just stupid. Luckily, not all the alien are armed with that cannon only one or two for every dozen aliens or so, which reminds me of enemies in P.O.W . Even so, they're very lethal without weapon thanks to their brutish strength. One more thing. The Aliens don't engage the human with their flying vessel. Perhaps the place where Jack put the dynamites is their hangar's entrance. Maybe.

 

Meanwhile, Ella and Jack infiltrate the Alien base from cave where Jack escaped. He found this gold vaporizing/extraction machine. Looks gorgeous, doesn't it?

 

Outside of the cave, Ford's scout who's an Apache got bitten in the neck while saving Ford himself. His last word: "Save Percy, your son!". With his death, The Apaches who once fight only from cliffside now join with the cowboys side by side. Such wonderful cooperation.

 

Deep inside the cave, Jack and Ella find the hostages. They're being hypnotized by alluring blue light in ceiling. I assume this treatment is the substitution for anesthetic. Such inhumane procedure. Oh, wait! They're aliens. Carry on!

 

While Ella rescues the hostages, Jack confront any aliens inside the base. Some of them has the same bracelet as Jack's but they don't have sensible idea of "take cover and shoot". While the rest try to outnumber or outspeed him but they fail miserably. Even though they can crawl along the wall/ceiling. 

 

Sheriff's son who is tasked to give signal if he see the hostages, is forced to retreat because an Alien approaches his position. He hide into the hole but discovered by another ones. Luckily, the hole is too narrow for the alien to harm the kid. Thus it resolve to grab him by using its inner hand. So it opens its diaphragm...

 

...and then he stabs its heart with the knife that Mr. Ford gave him. Thank to its stupidity about its own anatomy, the alien perishes. Such moronic alien.

 

After frees all of the hostages, Ella delves further into the alien base instead exits the cave along with them. Turns out, she want to destroy it. She need Jack's bracelet for that. In order to make it released from Jack's arm, he must lost his mind. But, how? Knock him unconscious seems not working on much much moment ago, remember? So she smooches Jack so hard that it come off his arm. Whatever.

 

Ella enter a hole that connects to Alien base that immediately close as she enters. She's on the route of no return. Leaving Jack only armed with a revolver to fight an alien with plasma cannon. She's schmuck, alright.

 

Jack goes to this surgery room to take shelter from plasma bombardment. But an alien (presumably who was shooting back there) grabs him and proceed to cut his head. The alien has long scar in its head. So it must be the "Medic" who failed to experiment Jack. It's in for revenge!

 

Fortunately, Harrison Ford comes in time to save Jack. Little did the alien knows that he's adept at shooting alien as Han Solo. It's going to have bad day.

 

Jack grabbed rifle that happen to be lying around here. He then shoot Alien's arm, making it flinched and knocked back. What's this? Dead Space? Once the alien stumbled on a gold vaporizing/extraction machine. Jack shoots gold deposit above. Pouring hot melted gold unto the alien, killing it.

 

For some reason, the aliens activate its shuttle and fly away. Are they cornered? I don't think so. The battle is still on their favor, i believe. So why they withdraw? I simply don't know.

 

Inside the shuttle, Ella manage to reach the chamber where core of the ship is located. That's bright thing over there is the core. The wall on the side stores (presumably) premature aliens. So the ship act as the mother of the aliens? What's this? Alien Storm?

 

Ella sets the bracelet like Predator sets the self-suicide bomb. Thus she explodes herself along with the alien rocket and aliens within. Besides explosion with conventional color, there's also this ones with blue color, that looks very pretty and sci-fi.

With that, the Apaches and the town citizens are reunited. While Jack got no one. Am i the only one to see Jack as pitiful lonely man?

 

Quite later, Jack back to the cabin to put garland to memorialize his fair lady. How nice of him.

 

In Doc's bar, everyone have big celebration. Doc dances joyfully with his reunited wife. Hunt and his Mexican buddy seem out of the gang, are happy with valuable gold that they got from the alien base dubbed as "Demon's Gold". See that yellow pebbles near the candle? That's the gold. I'm quite relieved to know that Alien's gold are salvageable, otherwise i feel bad for Jack who said that promise back there.

 

Suddenly, Mr. Ford enter the bar. The crowd goes silence. The music stops. He picks Percy who's in bar with Sheriff's son. Before he leaves, he said that he treats 1 round to everyone in this bar. The crowd cheers!

 

The town become more prosperous than before (when the gold mine nearby is dry) thanks to share of "Demon's Gold". Jack visits the town for the last time. He don't want to say goodbye because he's wanted man. Ford replies with false testament that he believe he saw Jack died in that cave. Then Sheriff said his disappointment that he can't  hangs Jack himself now. Shortly after that, Jack leaves.

What i think about Cowboys and Aliens (2011) that last 2 hours? The title isn't misleading, i can admit that. Except it involve Apache if you're really nitpicky. But i can tell that the story is quite childish. Not the "everyone's condition become better at the end" part. I like that one. The part that i'm quite bothered is the simple flow of the action against alien, beside cavalry warfare that i mentioned before. Fight the aliens and then destroy the core that happens to be source of creating the alien. That's something that childish high schooler of me come up on his comic. Yes, i drawn comic. Until now, even. But i see in credit that Steven Spielberg is involved in making this movie as Executive Producer. So the story's grade should be pretty legit, right? How about this? The movie has B grade story but AAA visual & sound effect. At least the story flows well especially about Jack's fact while he's amnesiac. It has lots of action too. I like the cowboy/bandit CQC that Jack did. It's good to watch. The romance can be ignored which is fine by me. You can probably guess that this movie contain dozen explosion. That's good if you're into that kind of thing.

Maybe you think that i give you recommendation to watch Cowboys and Aliens (2011) judging by previous statements. The truth is i can't. Yes, it has many action and explosion. But because of how stupid the anti-alien warfare and the aliens themselves, i don't get attached with the movie. I prefer Independence Day or Mars Attacks. You may ignore my opinion, though. As i'm not alien-invasion movie expert. At least it's quite better than Cloverfield. By the way, i apologize that the article comes out late. I'm sorry.